Generally, choice is a positive thing. But in the case of wedding planning, it’s a beast of burden. Sure, it’s wonderful to have choices, but once I started planning our wedding, I realized pretty quickly why weddings are a multi-billion dollar industry.
Remember when wedding dresses were white, and that was it? Now you can snag the perfect dress in blush, champagne, purple, or even gray. Some brides choose a white dress and accent it with their wedding colors. You can get your dress long or short, in A-line, sheath, mermaid, or princess styles. Some brides even forgo the dress completely in favor of pants. The possibilities are literally endless.
I can’t say I thought about a wedding that much before I met my fiancé. On those rare occasions when I did daydream about it, I envisioned a very simple ceremony and reception, relatively small, inexpensive and casual, somewhere on the beach or outside. Mostly I focused on the daydream of having the perfect guy to marry. As soon as I found him and we got engaged, I was bombarded with questions I couldn’t answer, advice I didn’t ask for, and choices I had no clue how to make.
According to my wedding planner – which is not a person (that’s for rich people) but a book – if we want to get married in September of 2015, we are already behind the eight ball on decision-making. Even an inanimate object has managed to give me indigestion. So I thought to myself, “BREATHE…and simplify.” Make one small decision so you can get back in control (or give yourself the illusion that you are in control because really, you aren’t).
Riiiiight. As IF there are any “small” decisions in the planning of a wedding. I think, OK, wedding colors. I know I don’t want bright red, dark brown, any shade of yellow, or puke green. But that still leaves orange, green, blue, purple and all the shades in between like gray, beige, coral, periwinkle, sage, pewter, teal and lilac. God forbid you choose a coral and teal color scheme and then have the nerve to plan your wedding in a season that doesn’t complement those colors. And the entire time you are thinking about what your bridal party will say when you show them the colors you finally picked out (hint: it will be the opposite of how you want them to react).
Everyone keeps telling me to do things “my way,” the way we want, without caring about what our guests think. This is usually followed by a statement like, “By the way, you should totally use my photographer” or “Personally I prefer an inside reception” or “Buffet-style is so tacky!” Plus, I really do want everyone to feel comfortable and have a great time. After all, a wedding is basically a huge expensive party that you actually remember to take pictures of.
So I’m trying to stay calm through all the decisions I need to make while also trying to include my future husband and appease my family and friends. But I’ve got a little trick up my sleeve (or pocket, cause I haven’t decided if I want sleeves or not). One of the 85 wedding websites I subscribed to in an attempt to organize the chaos said that somewhere along the line every bride has a “zilla” moment that will be totally justified. So I’m just gonna save it all up for the day when my bridezilla moment hits.
Here’s hoping it won’t be the actual wedding day.